Where's my soap box? Lights, microphone but no audience. Nobody wants to read this! Yeah?? But, here we go anyway-man. And man, did I have a lot to write.
Would you tell others I am ugly? Would you call me ugly to my face?
I do wonder why you are reading this and would be shocked to know you read the entire thing.
Here are some things a man is not supposed to say because we don't complain and cry.
Where do I begin? How do I start? Who am I writing to? How much can I write without losing your interest? Is this experience worth writing?
First, I wrote waaay more than I intended and spent too much time dealing with women’s impact on short men. With that said I give you:
[Part 1] A Short Man’s Experience: Phenotype determines genotype
What is a part of me?
I'm a 5"2 black man with no shoes (well, I have shoes--plenty of shoes but with no shoes I'm 5"2-lol); about 5”3 and a half with shoes; 5”4 in boots. I grew up in a black affluent neighborhood. A chatham neighborhood the sign read. I can give you a very long history of who I am and what I have accomplished, but I am writing to tell about the part I have spoken to no one about, except my brother when I was 29. I am writing about the part of my life that is not complimentary. Nobody else has ever heard my voice on the topic. I'm gonna keep this as short as I can. Sorry, I couldn't be shorter.
First off, Napoleon syndrome does not exist. Napoleon was 5"6 around the time when the average height was 5"5. Short man syndrome also does not exist. Short men being associated with being weaker than taller men is a myth. Tall Men formerly being a threat to women's safety and women having to run to taller men to protect them from animals and other tall men is also a myth. Discrimination against short men is ALL 2 True.
http://heresyourfix.wordpress.com/2010/02/20/true-story-why-napoleon-could-never-have-had-a-napoleon-complex/
http://www.digitaljournal.com/article/180853/
http://www.news.com.au/national/doctors-debunk-short-man-syndrome-myth/story-e6frfkp9-1111113254807
How many media, propaganda, commercials ridicule height? The credit score commercials with 3 men show a short 5”4 ish, fat, bald man digging in his ears and smelling his underarms with a low-short 583 score standing next to taller and more attractive facially and body wise men with higher credit scores. The take away is taller men don't only look better than short men, but also are more physically fit, smiling and happy, wealthier, and better investors. The taller man also taps the shorter man on his back and bullies him out of the space the shorter man occupies. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CU5iBWG2tI4
Title Max is another commercial. Kevin Hart is another comedian who ridicules himself over height.
At the bottom of this essay are over 30 sources that validate that every scientific study has yielded and accepted that it is not a complex within the short man's mind that contributes to the prejudices he receives in the world; but it is the treatment, prejudice, biases, violence, and ignorance of OTHERS--that has been proven to be the main factor-and only factor as to why short men are not hired in positions of power, ridiculed and teased well beyond childhood and into adulthood, the least (meaning nobody on dating websites receives fewer responses)likely to receive a reply on all dating websites, and believed by others to carry personality traits that cannot be proven true for short men.
According to ABC news and numerous studies women will choose a tall prisoner with no job who has terrible social skills and is not likable before they choose a short man of 5'4 who is kind and professional. http://abcnews.go.com/Health/MensHealthNews/story?id=8347950
http://abcnews.go.com/2020/Story?id=230011&page=1
ttps://implicit.harvard.edu/implicit/
http://wn.com/height_discrimination
http://nypost.com/2013/12/08/short-men-dont-stack-up-with-nyc-women/
http://www.thegloss.com/2013/05/06/beauty/gosh-i-feel-bad-for-short-men/
http://www.digitaljournal.com/article/180853/
http://www.eharmony.com/dating-advice/dating/why-do-women-all-seem-to-want-taller-men/
I have always been the shortest in school. In 2nd grade I was supposed to be the lead actor for a play (where I got to play the villain named Dark Chocolate) I studied hard for, but the teacher went to my mother and said “he's the best, but he's too short. I don’t think he will be able to play the part because of his size.” My mother, all of 4"10 on a good day told her something that I do not remember, but I do remember getting the part and having the crowd of 200 people cheering and clapping for me at the school play.
Later in my years I never dealt with height because it never really was a part of my psyche. I never thought about it. I was not picked on at the time for being short and due to my physical nature and brother who was 4 years older than me I always played with people 3 or 4 years older than me which made me very tough and athletic when I was around people my own age; sometimes I picked on others (smacking the back of their heads or thumping ears or challenging them to wrestle) my age and sometimes defending myself against those that wanted to fight me, but this was due to being male and not due to height. I can and I could tell the difference. I also never lost a fight. (This is in no way to slander anyone who has lost fights due to height. I have lost countless mental fights and teasing bouts and bullying bouts)
At 3"7 in the 3rd grade I was cool and the kid you wanted to hang out with (not the most popular-but popular and well liked) but enough of that. Nobody wants to hear about how I never went to 5th grade because I was skipped from 4th grade to 6th grade. Even then I was not picked on for being short, although I did wrestle with kids two years older than me constantly; but they liked me and I did the normal fights young kids do.
However I did experience jealousy and hatred from kids and their parents when I was introduced to my 6th grade class as: "this is (insert my name). He was skipped from the 5th grade." -Kids just love to respect that. That didn’t invite unwanted negative attention at all.
After half a year of showing them I could play basketball very well and pretty much all sports, and I could fight; and while doing all this I was never trying to noticeably upstage any of them. This probably helped my acceptance. I never had to prove myself and I never was desperate to use my ego. I just played.
So where am I getting at? My point is it was not until 8th grade that the constant reminder of me being short was brought to me by others. I knew I was short, but short just meant short. I guess that’s what many other people when teasing you think it means to them. This is why they say it with smiles as though you are going to like what they are saying and it is going to start a good humorous conversation. But, when someone 35 comes up to someone 32 and says “Hey, you’re short,” it is not perceived that way by the short person and nor should it be. It is not like saying "hey, your eyes are green." Nobody would go up to someone and say “Hey, you’re ugly.” They say it to short people as though noticing the obvious is not an insult (there are no positives attributed to shortness in the english language; all attributions to shortness are paralleled with deficiency and weakness), although I will show you how much it is.
When I was in 7th grade everything changed. I would discover the one experience in my time that surpassed racial oppression. Kids in middle school (middle school for me was 7th and 8th grade with exactly1,086 students) were 3 years older than me and cruel. Girls and boys would bump into me on purpose to try and make me drop books. They would point and laugh. Students would constantly tease me and ask "are you lost, the elementary school is across the street." "Who let you in here?" Teachers and students would laugh as I walked down the hallway. “Awww, he’s sooo cute.” This is not said in a good way.
7th grade, there was no preparation for the treatment placed on me. I was alone. I never saw this coming. From every angle the teases would come so much that all I heard were voices. I didn't know who to fight. We had 5 minutes to go from one class to the next. I would stay in a class after the bell rang until 4 minutes passed--so that I could run to my next class and avoid the teasing hallways. My friends from elementary school abandoned me and did not want to hang out with me. I couldn't find them either, because my middle school had 1,000 students and it combined students who just graduated from more than 5 elementary schools. This was my introduction to letting me know that my shortness bothered other people.
I turned to the bible and read a chapter of the bible every day from that point on-until I graduated college, rarely ever missing a day, and if I did miss a day I would make up for it by reading two chapters. I prayed a lot and I cursed God and I prayed to God and talked to God. I never heard anything back, but I felt comfort. I can give God praise and credit for saving me from getting beat up and being a friend I could talk to when nobody else asked about my experience. He helped me but did not relieve me of the experience I have to endure.
It was not until the 8th grade that my handling being short with a positive attitude proved not to be beneficial. I played basketball on a AAAA middle school team and we went undefeated, and one of the best high schools in my area said I could play for them on the JV team the next year. I collected friends and status again.Then the time for awards for character traits came along. Unlike 4th grade when my teacher Ms.Speice gave me an award for being the bravest student she taught and put it in writing: "(insert my name) is the most likely student to wrestle a lion, a kiss a snake, and travel the world" and then another student got the most funny, popular, athletic, or another student got the most likable or charming. No this was 8th grade now and the assembly was before all the students and teachers in the gym. There was a microphone, a podium, and an announcer. They called my name to accept "the shortest person in the school award". Yes. I received an award. In good stride I went and accepted it and the teacher gave me the microphone after saying "is there anything you would like to say?" I smiled and said "Thank you. I want to thank all of you for voting. Many people don't get what they want in life. I worked really hard on being short and I'm glad I achieved it. I always wanted this." This was my response, and I have no clue what made me say this or where the clever lines came from.
I am a thoughtful person, but not clever or this quick witted. It was not prepared. I walked away and another teacher took me by the shoulder and apologized and said: "I had no idea they would do that. Nobody told me they were giving that. I am sorry. You are better than I am and I admire you for handling it that way. You didn't have to do that." I wish I could take the credit for my words, but honestly I was naive and my response was not one of thought but one detailing how truly unaware I was of how my height was perceived and how it affected other people.
Suddenly, the 250 awards I had on my wall at the age of 12 in 8th grade would not see this new one. I hid it under my bed at home. I would say this is my earliest memory that being short was the culprit to a new host of problems that would be mine and only mine.
Alienation is the feeling a short man receives, again I must emphasize 5"2. I have heard in passing conversations men 5"9 or even 5"7 speak on being short and I have not responded to them at all. We do not share the same world on this point. Please, excuse me using a constant reference to weight, but there is a big difference to being 30 pounds overweight and 200 pounds overweight. They are not the same experience and neither is 5"7 to a man 5"4 and under.
Since short men always have to defend themselves against people who are constantly on the side of saying "you're wrong," for some odd reason –maybe it is the accusers that crave truly justifying themselves for their prejudices/beliefs. Here's a definition of short men:
http://www.shortsupport.org/Misc/whowho.html#limit
Notice the standard deviation is 3inches lower or higher than the average which concludes that if you are a little above average or below then you are that and therefore not tall or short but on the side of tall or short. Thus short is to be considered that which is not the average, and short on the chart is seen for males as 5"4 and below.
Here's the dictionary's DEFINITION OF SHORT MEN http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=short%20person. In case you don't feel like going to the site, it says 5"5 and under. This is according to the USA if you are that technical. In this urban dictionary on the same page are the following jokes:
Wow, there are so many short people around me! Do you think they'll mind it if i use them as an armrest?
Certain people who's main attack is to jump up and bite your ankles. I'm not talking about slightly short or on the little side, I mean fucking SHORT people.
Short people generally have big hair and big personalities, to make up for their lack of height.
Tall people: I'm average and dull.
Short people: I'm smart and spunky to make for my lack of a lower body. It's weird 'cause my torso's pretty normal.
Kristin is a small person.
Kristin likes to order from the kids menu at red lobster.
In 10th grade I began receiving separation from close friends. Friends, who used to hang around me, disappeared and no longer called me on the phone in 3 way conversations to have me talk to girls for them.
These were guys who we used to go to the mall together, sleep over each other's houses and I was the one who for the most part introduced games, events and conversation to them. They would take notes from me on how to talk to women. My younger cousins would do the same thing to me and try to walk like me and to this day my younger cousins still talk like me, lift weights like me, play basketball like me and dress nice and tell me it was me. It's also not hard to see when people are trying to be like you, especially when their parents point it out. This is even amidst the insults hurled at me for being short by family; but they admired me without knowing that through my window I was paying a high price to get what they wanted. It was also getting harder for me to maintain my integrity, pride, and status since they began to question my authority and challenge me. I would have to fight them and reprove my worth. The price was more expensive to me than it was for them to beat up cousins from 2 years older than myself to four years younger. I was not trying to be influential and my main mantra in life has always been "please be true to your personality and inner thoughts, do not behave in ways to fit in for popularity sake. " Yes at 10, for some straaaange reason I would tell this to my cousins and I do still believe in this today. I would now add "give your best attitude to people and while being genuine-be someone that people will want to be around." To this point I must admit another truth: part (not all but a part)of not being liked as a short man has nothing to do with height. People in general don’t like people who do not do something for them: either you are cute and they want to be associated with you b/c you are attractive, you are funny, you are entertaining, you are popular, you are rich, dependable, you are troubled and interesting, you remind them of themselves. Either way if you don’t do these things for people you will also find that people by the masses are not so friendly to not only short people but anyone who does not “do” something for them.
Alienation is the reason I went to college over 14 hours away from everyone I knew to the University of Iowa. I couldn't stand to see people I hadn't seen in 10 to 15 years all in the same school in college (since I went to over 6 schools from elementary to high school and they ALL were going to go to the same college where 95% of us went--if you were from this state) with mustaches and mature bodies and living college up for all its worth while I sat on the sidelines. The same guy who was once popular, athletic and charming with women and talented was now perceived and treated as the bench warmer nobody wanted on the team. I could see the future. I would be invited to the parties but ignored. I would be seen trying to enter conversations but having backs turned on me. I could see everyone assuming I wanted to hang out with them and them not wanting to hang out with me. I couldn't stand being popular for all the wrong reasons. Being 5"2 in college would make me popular but not liked.
There is a HUGE difference between working against people's preconceptions of wanting NOT to like you versus immediately being given a clean slate or in those few circumstances some people are blessed under--those being where people immediately like them and want to like them regardless of how unlikeable that person actually is.
In college, I needed to go where I could disappear and not be known by people who knew who I was. I couldn't bare to have former friends make jokes at my expense and not be able to fight them. I couldn't stand everyone dating women I once talked to till 3am in the morning in high school and in junior high (the part when I was liked again in 8th grade) now ignoring me and treating my jokes as though I was the awkward and the lame one, and a second class citizen. It's not funny when the things you say are insightful, cool and you're talented but everyone has come to a silent agreement to just ignore you.
Then the strange thing happens where you notice people repeating things you said, but they ignored you when you said them but now that someone else says it--the very thing you once said is now brilliant or funny as long as it is under the mouth of another. This is what happened before I was struck with terrible acne and braces in the 9th and 10th grade, but I still played on the JV basketball team.
I know my writing can be schizophrenic, but let me randomly throw in the oddity that now many single male friends want me to go to clubs with them to get women now in my 30's. They prefer to take me, over more attractive men. Why? You know why, I'm sure you do. Crazy how things turn from friends not inviting me, to now being the go to friend to be invited; both being for selfish reasons. I am not stupid. It is because I am the equivalent to the pretty girl's much less attractive friend that knows how to carry a conversation and has interesting perspectives. If I am their sidekick-wingman then I can help carry conversation and be friendly all while opposing no sexual threat at all for my friend to being considered more attractive to the women my friend's want to approach. I will be the entertainment and make the date easy for them. In other words, I am no competition and I help my friend's look better. Plus, as they always note, you can fight and so if anything happens I know you have my back. Wow, how many women would be surprised to hear that? Since I've alluded to fighting probably too much in this essay let me say although I've never had my ass kicked after 4 years old, I am not stupid by a long shot to think I am anyone's go to fighter. I can get my ass kicked and I have had some very hard fights I do not care to fight again. I just haven't had my ass kicked. I don't need anyone trying to prove they can beat me up.
But, getting back to my friends. As a short man I have had to wonder if my friends are really friends at all or are they the only people that were left over after a long list of people that through society have learned to ignore me. I have 8 ridiculously close great friends as people, but actually probably only 2 that I can say our personalities and the way our spirits get along make us really friends by the definition of best friend; funny thing is I’m probably not their best friend. I wonder if this makes sense, because the other 6 I've known for much longer and probably closer as far as communicating with each other; but they are not friends I would claim as being spiritually aligned. You feel me? So in a sense, many friendships that could be true have been sacrificed. Some friendships that never would have been have been fostered.
Schizophrenic
I can't explain, on another point, how many people think I wear lifts in my shoes. Since those tallmenshoes commercials and lifts commercials all of a sudden everyone believes I wear lifts. They always look at my shoes and then look at each other and start smiling or laughing. Just because commercials show men wearing lifts in their shoes, they automatically think I wear them because I am short. I don't have good ears, but I even overheard one girl mentioning that at the next Christmas party she was going to throw lifts onto the dancefloor. At first I thought it was my imagination hearing this, but I knew it wasn't.
"How tall is he?" The 3 qualities that are the most popular saying in storybooks: Tall, dark and handsome. Tall is the first and most important one to most women and certainly if not tall--then how far from that meter does short rank?
I am attractive in the face and have been able to attract many women's smiles when I am sitting down, but when I stand they laugh to my face. Due to the nature of the conversation I have with women they feel comfortable in saying "I didn't know you were short. You're really short." Yes. Yes. My conversation with women is never a problem and many times my male friends in college and high school would ask me on the phone to pretend to be them or to tell them. My dates usually are great and end off with a kiss but after one or two dates I rarely have another with attractive women. If they are attractive then they have kids, and I have to hear “my 9 year old son is about your height.” If they are unattractive in personality or physique then I can have as many dates as I like. To that, I become the hypocrite.
Can you imagine being the one in the family at the age of 22 who's very little cousins (not the ones who admired me) of age 10 run up to you and throw their hands out to measure themselves against you? They yell "shrimp, short stop, shorty, dwarf" and their parents which are your cousins (not the 2 cousins I will describe later who I fought, but cousins on my mother's side who range from 8 years older than me to 20 years older than me---then their kids range from 15 years younger than me to just now being born. On one side of my family of first cousins I have 112 family members, now that we have 2nd cousins the number has increased; and we're unbelievably close) never tell their kids stop? Can you imagine being the one that other parents talk about in the car on their way to family reunion and make jokes about "he's 26 but still looks like he's 12,"? That boy ain't never gonna grow up." "At least you're taller than (insert my name)…" "I hear (insert my name) is wearing lifts in his shoes." It's not true, but now they contrive ways for me to enter a room and have to take off my shoes.
In the past it was " (insert my name) ain't grown, God I hope he don't stay that height forever. I can never guess his age, because he's always 10. I don't want my son to be like (insert my name) height. Does he still shop in the children’s department?”
Then when they see you they're all smiles and ask how come you don't come around them. The kids let you know what the parents say. You are the cousin that is short and nobody wants to be your height. My existence is a model to serve as what they don't want their kids height to be and they used my name to scare their kids into changing their own behavior and eating vegetables. From the time I was 14 to 29 this was said, but I didn't pay attention until I was 28 and I could recall all those things I heard. These were the people that were like gods to me and I loved them more than anyone and anything in the world. Then, one day I just thought about what they were saying and what made their kids repeat to me what they were saying and I had to admit it; and my brother confirmed it to me that he'd heard what they said about me.
Later their words changed to: Look at his fancy car. He's compensating for his lack of height. Look at his full ride college scholarship to a Big 10 school. He better get one because he ain't gonna have a chance with that height. Only reason he got it is because he has to hit them books, ain't nothing to take his mind away from them. Look at his house. He's trying to show he has money to overshadow he is short. He's funny because he's short? He's deep because he's short? Doesn't he wear lifts in his shoes? Can I borrow a $1,000? Can you help me move? Can you find me a job?
Now before I end this let me show the logic people take out on short men: [THEY Don't believe you. It's a conspiracy I tell you. They don't believe anything I say and make me out to be the bad guy. It's all corporate big brother illuminati. We all know as soon as we leave the room everyone is ready to talk about us. Lol-I don’t think or believe the former. It’s a joke. I do believe most people are highly unconscious of their behavior, comments and feelings harbored towards short men, and in the same manner people gossip without meaning to be offensive, they offend without truly in their hearts meaning to do so.]
People do seek to find reasons to validate their prejudices and preconceived notions. They think short men blame everything on height. So, these people make it a point to not listen or give a short man an ear when they hear him speak on social matters, religion, politics, or facts because his opinion is skewed and biased/influenced by his experiences as a short man, therefore he doesn't see things correctly. You see it one sided because you don't have the privilege of the other perspective. Therefore when people believe this, they help to reinforce an environment that teaches others not to believe short men on anything. When I speak on anything, most peoples' first reaction is to challenge anything I say or just blatantly say that's not true. I don't care if it's me telling them a lion and a tiger just had a baby. If I yell in a room and say I brought doughnuts for everyone. Nobody turns their head. I have to tell someone else, personally, I brought doughnuts and then when that person grabs a doughnut and says to the others (insert my name) "brought doughnuts" all of a sudden I am recognized….or the doughnuts are recognized. This just happened to me last week during the Christmas holidays. "You are in a pub, having a discussion with a group of strangers. The topic of conversation is one in which you are an expert. But it seems that everyone else, no matter how little they know about the subject, knows more than you." I'm stealing this perfect example from http://www.shortsupport.org/Essays/MichaelCalwell.html
Don't believe short men. Don't listen to short men. If a short man acknowledges he sees what people are doing to him and his words--then all he does for the people--is confirm to them that the short man acknowledges his height as a disadvantage and weakness in the world of men and women, therefore proving their claim, stereotype, belief to be true which is that his height affects his psyche and he cannot be impartial. If a short man speaks about being short, it is his fault. He has the problem. The world is fine. If I slap you, blame the nerves on your face. Don't blame me or my hand for smacking you. You must be crazy. Plus, I smacked you in the past. Plenty of people get smacked. I'm not smacking you now. You make it out to be more than what it was. You are complaining about a slap when people are getting shot.
No matter if a short man is funny or wise people see he is short, small, deficient, lacking the very essence of what many use to define masculinity. To be associated in such a way is to be a loser and an outcast. Even if you're not, the response you get is "you're not like other short men." If the short man voices any of this then this is the response again "we knew that's what he thought. He has the problem. He thinks we think him less, but he thinks this and we don't. Oh, how terrible a psyche it is for people like him. He is troubled, insecure, and less confident than the rest of us." I remember a verse on Jesus when the Pharisees used this same logic on him, although it had absolutely nothing to do with his height.
At the age of 12, my mother took me to an endocrinologist to put me on HGH, but she didn't want to pay for it. So I never took it. I don't blame her for that. I'm 32 now and not once has anyone in my family ever asked me about being short or brought the subject up to be talked about.
Well let me go on to over hearing an aunt at family reunion, and I have many many aunts and uncles. There were about 13 of them in the kitchen, as I slept in the next room and woke up to their laughter.
They say my mother's name, as my mother is also in the kitchen. My aunt goes on "(insert my mother's name) kids are so short. You know ain't none of them over 5 feet" Now, my brother is 5"9 without shoes. "It's a blessing (insert my sister's name) she finally married someone 6"0. God knows (insert my mother's name) couldn't give them no help. Family full of midgets." I'm 27 or 28 when I hear this.
[Part 2]Psychology
I cannot believe you will read this long essay, but I feel it necessary to show the good side of being short.
The good side is that you will probably be more in tune with other people’s feelings and hardships in life. You will also probably better appreciate when people are kind to you and not take it for granted or expect it or feel entitled to it.
I do not like the negative portrayal I have given women in this essay and I do find it unfair since I have not included the hundreds of judgments men put on women.
Due to being in this situation I can recognize and I have witnessed some of the lower forms of negative human behavior and I have learned to throw off negative people’s criticisms and change that person for the more positive. In other words I am not easily offended and I do not write-off people for saying rude things and having negative opinions, instead I try to offer positivity and a different way to see their negativity in a positive light.
If I hadn’t lived the life I’ve lived I probably would not have these skills, but then again maybe I would. My biggest suggestion is: Don’t ever let height get you down or motivate you to feel like you have anything to prove. If you focus too much on anything you can’t change it will negatively absorb you. Nobody, even yourself, wants to be around negativity. Recognize it for what it is so that you know what you are dealing with and so that you won’t be ignorant as to why some people believe what they do; after that then just have fun with life, conversations, relationships in whatever you do.
I have had some relationships with women. A few relationships I had to leave. My main point is that when picking a mate you just can't go for anybody that will take you, but you also should go toward what is good for you and what you are attracted to; while recognizing there will be a compromise and some things you must prioritize. Thus, if your selection is reduced drastically due to superficial lessons perpetuated and exploited in society that bare no truth or real merit to match the degree of emphasis someone place's on it; then I must call this out because it effects ME. I can see however, that the voice of short men has not been heard and so I speak out on discrimination from experience from every angle I’ve witnessed due to height in this essay.
The other side of psychology:
I shouldn't have to defend myself and I don't want to defend myself. Defending oneself is the admission that I am attacked.
People often smile at you because they like you. People often laugh at what you say because they like you and want you to think they find you interesting. People normally mirror your expression. People often pretend that they hear you, even when they don’t because they do not want to be rude or ask you to repeat yourself. If you are short and funny you are compensating. If you are short and quiet then you are quiet because you are short. If you are likeable, you are that “short guy”. If you are an athlete and short, you all of a sudden only play sports because “you have something to prove.” If you dress nicely and are short you are compensating. If you have a nice car and you are short you are compensating. If you wear boots it is because you are short. If you wear flat shoes you are wearing lifts. If you lift weights it is because you are trying to be big because you are short. If you speak loudly then you speak loudly because you are short. If you are slow to anger it is because you are mild-mannered because you are passive which is due to the fact that you are short. If you are quick to be angered and correct people whenever they insult you and you do not hesitate to fight them, you have napoleon syndrome and you respond this way because you are short. If you win the fight against a tall person then you are “the midget who beat up…” If you talk about being short then it is because you are short, not because what you say is true. I think you should get the point. For many people there is nothing a short man can do that can separate him from being seen and heard as short and looked at only for his height instead of his true quality. Short is the attachment to him the way a metaphor is to being compared to something. It defines 90% of you to other people. It does not matter if you do not see yourself this way. Other people see this of you, so it must be true and even if it is not true then they will make their presumptions the truth and use it against you anyway. If you deny it then it is because it is true. If you accept it is because it is true. If you try to help others understand that this tactic of judging you is evil and wrong then you have the problem for acknowledging it. Why? Because you are making more out of it then there really is.
The first thing someone that is even willing to admit heightism exists will do is relate it immediately to some other form of discrimination with the purpose of either trivializing your point or showing the futile nature of trying to change their perception. Their main point is explained in many forms but basically saying this in some way or another. 'Being short is like having one eye bigger than the other, it is like a person who is ugly in the fact that it is relative, it is like being overweight, it is like being socially awkward, it is like having a lisp. You aren’t going to get people to take criticism against short people seriously. How short are you talking? 5”8 or 5”7? Many people are short. Get over it. Well, it’s hard to do when you make me under it and it’s not me with the problem but you. It's all in your attitude, it depends on how you carry yourself. Lol. Wait, a second read the sentence before the lol again. The best one is "you have to make up for height." There's nothing to make up for. I am me. It is not me in denial over what is within my control to say and to laugh at. It is you who denies it exists and the serious nature of it. Why should I have to do anything extra that you or no other man does? If I do anything to compensate for height then that would in essence be the real problem and insecurity.
Do not get my entire essay wrong. Do not let height change your behavior. Your height is something that some ignorant people allow to change their treatment towards you in a negative manner. Don’t ever let it change you for the better or worse. [The things I do to complement myself are for me or the ones in life I love.]
Relevance?
But if relevance is only acknowledged according to one’s ability to prove exclusivity then here we go. There aren’t many things that make it exclusive, but one thing that it does fall on with in the exclusivity line is in the manner of which it is perfectly accepted by society to ridicule, oppress, publicly ostracize, berate, insult and demean the short man while being able to blame the short man for having the problem and being too sensitive if he defends himself against the perpetrator. I have not seen many other forms of discrimination in this way. Almost every group that receives discrimination in the USA has a group to defend them politically, media wise and socially or at least it is perceived by the vast majority of society to be rude and immoral to chastise someone different. There is support for them whereas for short men there is no support because it is not a problem. Very few physical traits render a person to be ridiculed by parents, family, friends and potential spouses in public and private as being acceptable behavior exemplified onto a short man--just for being short. There is virtually no defense of the short man in media, the bible (yes, the bible often glorifies height) or society. It is not even considered something worth mentioning as discrimination. Many other physical traits (that do not dive into physical health handicaps) can be controlled, hidden, lost with exercise, surgically removed, make-up applied, cosmetically altered. Very, very, very few other healthy people that are not different in race, religion or orientation are ridiculed this way. Very few people withOUT health problems or health risks, or social problems have faced the ridicule and oppression for being perfectly healthy and normal yet ostracized in society.
The next thing is the lack of numbers to support the short men. Men under 5”4 in America simply have very,very very few numbers. So the acceptance of harming short men verbally and physically is exclusive along with the degree of numbers being ….well—small. This is not to say there are no other forms of discrimination that share this, but there are very few; especially in relevance to the degree of cruelty and cultural push to emphasize, practice and perpetuate the prejudice and cruelty against short men while remaining free of repercussions or even feeling morally wrong. It even goes as far as that those jokes and prejudices help people socially rise and help businesses make money. Ridiculing short people can be a business; short people are also not excluded in trying to profit from it.
So what can be done? Don't offer a problem if you don't seek a solution.
The solution is for Short men to unite. Unite in purchasing power and become a group. Once you are a group that purchases and supports products in unity then we create a voice. Once petitions are signed and actions of discrimination cases are filed then the voice takes on a face. Demand short men to be in commercials, the lead character in movies where being short is not the subject or joke. Show short men in relationships with women and don't have being short be the point. Once the spending power of short men takes a direction, a voice, a face, and we become recognized as a group not worth offending then change will come. Right now, I will say it is not worth defending or arguing with people that make negative comments about short people. It will only make you look bad and people will not agree or listen. Find clever ways to make people notice discrimination against short men.Don’t excuse or accept your close friends making fun of your height if they’re really close to you.
[the former is not a contradiction to a change in your behavior]
I admire you who do not harbor negativity toward short men, because I have prejudices of my own in life and I try to be honest with them. So to have met people who are truly altruistic and pure is always a blessing. You are better than me, because often when I first see people who do appear average I will also prejudge them and then I remind myself not to do that. I will add that you are in the extreme minority of people I've met and I've travelled over 27 states and visited 8 countries.
Short men do find mates; It is just our selection will be severely limited; which means the woman you get might not actually be the woman you love or *dare I say* attracted to.
I have one foot off my soap box now.
Why not you? Why should anyone not be short or notice the drastic difference in someone as not only different but comical; and why not you?
Free speech, I am all for it. Although, if I have to explain why a person should not be free to initiate a violent confrontation then I think you have a problem. The other part of why I write this is due to my understanding of the world--in knowing how there is a possibility that the person doing this treatment to short people is not doing it to be mean and truly is naive; I am attempting to warn that person and inform that person that it is they who have initiated a negative circumstance in which the short person has the right to respond in any way we should deem reasonable.
It is the same as if someone decided to say something against everyone with green hair. You can say it. No problem. I have the right then and also to tell all my sponsors to stop sponsoring your show, all the people who work on your lights, do your sound, and write your scripts have the right to walk out on you. I have the right to get on CNN and broadcast before the world to those like me with green hair what you have said, so that they will be informed of who they were supporting. Say what you want. I have my rights and I will exercise my power too.
What would I compare being a short man to? I really think being a short man is by itself. There is not something to liken it to.
Well, actually I have found something to compare it with fairly. I can liken it to a parent having a favorite child. You love your parents. You can have a happy and successful life and enjoy your parents. Your parents can do things for you that 95% of the parents in the world don't do or give to their children. But, there is that one thing, that no matter how much else they've done right you just have to acknowledge and this is the fact that your parents love someone else better than you. They might have given you no reason at all to physically show they're favoritism, but you know it and you deal with it. Now, how does it feel? Now, what if your parents actually said to you: "We know we have a favorite and there's no reason for it. We just don't like you." Now watch as they give that sibling all the credit and gifts and attention while blaming you for their not loving you. This is the best example I can think of. This is close, very close to exactly what being a short man feels like. There are worse things in the world, but you notice because it touches your family and every facet of your life as people relate to you.
Let me get analytical for this paragraph. Humans (and really all living organisms) are a product of our environment. There is the nature of the individual and then there is how that individual must respond to the surroundings.
This is my point I am now making:If a beautiful person receives smiles from other people, courtesies, opened doors, many friends, job opportunities then that person might have a view point of the world as being a world that is open, full of surprises, nice people and mean people and weird people. Life to them is based on how you handle it because they are allowed to handle it. By this I mean life is not unfairly attacking them in every social and economic aspect.
However, there is another coin that says: If people respond to you weirdly (Think like the Stepford Wives or The Truman Show) and people look at you with crooked faces, pointed eyebrows, shunning movements of the head, and give you condescending remarks and offer no kind comments to you and give you quite the opposite then a person might respond to this. If every time I talk to you have to overtalk me and interrupt me or say that I am wrong without any reason to say I am wrong other than you just figure I don’t know what I’m talking about then this will effect my communication toward you.
What could I do to change your response? You have predetermined you care not to associate with me. There is no room for changing the conversation or you even giving me the chance to show personality; plus even if I cater my personality to you--I shouldn't have to. I am not here for your entertainment.
What if in a business meeting, whenever I talk nobody listens? What if in a social setting I am social but nobody listens to me, they only want to talk toward me? I have been victim of this, as well as probably millions of people not short--but when height is the reason then this is different. How do you know height is the reason? Well, when height is removed and office conversations are on phone then suddenly I am funny and well heard. On the internet, if I pretend to be someone taller by lying about my height; instantly women say how great a man I am and how wonderful my personality is. When I am at a club and I am sitting in a chair and I am talking to a woman that doesn't know how tall I am, I have her laughing and I have her telephone number within 10 minutes. This is why.
You see I am not anti-social and I am not someone who loses fights and I am not someone who is not considered cool. I do think and get the impression that many people do want me to be anti-social so that their preconceptions of short people being quiet and insecure can be confirmed. I get the feeling that people are mad to see me confident, teaching other people and carrying myself like a regular man. People get mad when you don't fit their stereotypes. People want you to play a role so that they can know how to treat you. Some, people want this, not all; but some get mad if a beautiful woman is not with a beautiful man. They will point this out with numerous criticisms.
I am the one who is pretty normal (average attitude) in almost everything I do or pretty good at it--one or the other. Please, excuse my bravado, but I am also not shy. Sometimes I am quiet, sometimes I talk. Sometimes I am brave and sometimes I am scared. I have good days and bad days. I have been able to engage in many relationships with people and very few meaningful romantic relationships with women that last past a month. I’ve probably had more short term relationships then average people, but it is only the long term that matter and this is where I do fall short.
I've been wrongly and correctly perceived as: don't get women, dresses nice, didn't play sports, quiet, not religious, deep thinker, soft, pretty boy, nice, gay (I’m not gay but since I haven't had a girlfriend in a while I’ve had this said), wears lifts, comes from a family not having money, didn't work 15 jobs, never did manual labor, can't fight, picked on in school, talkative, never a bully, shy, boring, brave,talented, loner, smart-alik, nerd, hard-core, napoleon syndrome, thug, business minded, not like other short men, liar, know-it-all, argumentative, ladies man.
Tears of a clown. Marco-Polo
I've traveled the world, done well financially (although I could care less about money; though I'm in no hurry to give it away), supported family members, given ample amounts of my time and my time and more time with those I love. I've been in situations where I know no one and walked out knowing most. I am not one who hides.
With all that said and done I never want to be ignorant and I do want to be observant; and trust me when someone teases you about things that are not true for you and these remarks go to children, women you like, it also effects if you get a job or raise or not, if someone decides to run into you physically for no reason, fight you or physically desire to be physically intimidating toward you, show this in cartoons, propaganda, video games and you never see the opposite side of positivity toward short men and showing short men in positive venues then YES, YES, YES I find it a necessary obligation that I owe to myself and others like me to speak. I am a fighter.
I have too much pride than to speak about the suicidal thoughts and really bad thoughts and plans that entered my mind from 8th grade to age 29. I have to go here briefly to explain how serious other people’s actions against a short man can actually warp a fairly easy going short man's mind like myself. When I wake up in the morning I don’t think I am short. When I walk in my kitchen I don’t think of things from a short man’s perspective. When I am around other short people (the few times I am ever around someone that is close to my height and male) we never talk about being short or someone else being tall. There is no short man revolution and there never will be. I believe in solutions and I have hope, but no expectations. If there ever was a revolution, it would most likely be done with paper bags over our heads because it is not within a man’s nature or desire to want to be seen standing up for being short in the eyes of other men. Most men prefer to hide those things that do not make us look GREAT. I truly do not like to make anyone's day worse by burdening them with thoughts that don't make them smile. This is why anybody who has read this I truly believe must also be a short male. Anyone else would probably scam through this and immediately comment, but for those with hearts bigger than mine I do have to ask why you read this because I truly, truly, truly don't think anybody who is not short cares--- and if you care--this would prove my essay wrong.
[part 3]SHORT as WEAK
I’ve read some people allude to the weakness and survival of the fittest and the evolution theory of man that makes people see their prejudices as natural, therefore okay. I don’t agree with it. First reason I don’t agree with it is I am short. I have won too many fights beating up people much taller than me my entire life. Second, the strongest men in the world in weight lifting competitions are often short (look at the many examples I provide in the articles section). The fact is-- most men just aren’t coordinated well. Women hopefully can attest to this fact by judging how we move sexually. Height doesn’t matter in coordination and it is to this I’m using also when it comes to survival and fighting.
Human intelligence has ruled the world since day one. If it didn't then wolverine's and the strongest animals on the planet would be ruling the earth. I'm not dumb enough to think Bill Gates can be Mike Tyson in a ring, but Bill could eradicate Tyson's existence in more ways than Tyson could do the opposite.
Even sports (as prejudice as the NBA is to short men with the talent to be in the NBA) shows use of short men equivalent to large men. In the NFL, MLB short men are running backs, 2nd basemen, half-backs, kickers. As far as wars go: Vietnamese, Japanese, Chinese, Koreans, martial arts have all proven that short men in war are a respectable challenge. If Tyson at 5"10 fought one-thousand Conan O' Brien's who do you think would win between this 7 inch difference same weight? I am also aware that my tone in this essay can turn many people off. I could change it, but I have to make a point. I am also not insensitive to very tall people's problems either. They have very valid arguments also for those 6"7 and above for those that do not appear visually proportioned in an attractive manner. But, I cannot write an encyclopedia on everything; so I will stick to my experience.
There was no time when humans beat each other up for survival without there equally also being the means of intelligence and coordination trumping height and brute strength. There have always been weapons. The way it is today is the way it was yesterday and the best way to predict the future is the past and present. Just like scientists once thought dogs survived off the wolf’s tactic of biggest wolf rules. They found out this was wrong among domesticated dogs and even among most but not all wolves. The friendliest and most intelligent (always the two together) male wolves mate the most and rule the pack or herd. I learned this on the internet, sadly and the Dog Whisperer on Animal Planet. He's also short, so I guess he doesn't know what he's talking about and biased. Seriously though, this is how humans since, our beginnings have survived….Intelligence. We never existed off (in my cave man voice) big man fights smaller man and take small man wife now. I hope the cavemen for geico aren’t offended.
If I tell you I like women with a flower shaped u know what, women who can sing, and a big butt and small waist then I can tell you it is superficial and based on nothing and probably most influenced by my environment and brainwashing. Phenotype. That's the truth. Either way I'm attracted to it the same way you are a tall man. But, when a person makes excuses and attaches certain attributes as though it makes sense and are right, when that person cannot prove man ever by fists was stealing wives from each other or the bigger man brought home the most food then there is no basis of opinion anymore than me saying "women used to have tails when they we were all chimpanzees and that's why I like women with long hair b/c it reminds me of our good old evolution days. Their big butts remind me of us running from sabertooth tigers and resemble strong thigh muscles to jump in the tree and keep my babies safe. That's why:
I like big butts and I cannot lie, You other brothers can't deny
That when a girl walks in with an itty bitty waist
And a round thing in your face……..
[I have a little sense of humor. Pun-intended]
Just do everyone a favor and end what you like off with—“ you just like it.” Don't self-righteously tie it to genotype, nature, 3 million years ago and God and something you cannot help.
Back to people thinking short men are equated with a weaker man.
Muscles follow a square-cube law. Voluminous/taller bodies are actually weaker and more fragile (thus NBA athletes are always injured), compared to a small body of the same proportions! It's about muscle leverage.
Even if you want to say you rely on biology. What time is this? Men’s average height used to be 5”3; so it doesn’t get much shorter. After the adoption of agriculture, the average height of man hit an all-time low at 5'3 in 3000 B.C. There is also proof that before this, men were also taller.
What time are we speaking of when biggest man got the woman and did so much protecting that it tattooed in women’s mind forever to never be attracted to a short man again? People did not start growing again to heights of 5”7 until a couple of hundred years ago (in the 1600’s the average height was 5”5) on history’s chart biological timeframe. So, when people want to get technical and use this logic as reasonable; I cannot sign on to it.
The average height of soldier’s in the civil war was 5”6.
http://www.scientificamerican.com/article.cfm?id=why-are-we-getting-taller
http://www.ehow.com/facts_6966652_average-height-humans-over-time.html
It also shows that the more money women make the more selective they become in choosing their mate. So, again it is a cultural status symbol that helps them form their choices and not biology. When women make less money and when women live in war torn countries or countries where there actually IS a FIGHT FOR FOOD, women actually choose, according to proof, shorter men.
http://www.infosources.org/what_is/Human_height.html
So, when women need protection due to their being less food and living in nations of poverty where crime runs rampant; women actually prove that in these circumstances, according to numbers, that their sexual preferences for height are erased? Yes. So, this proves biology and that BS excuse of protection has nothing to do with real life circumstances.
Instead, it is preference based on culture based on desire. There’s nothing wrong with that if she chooses, but there is something wrong with every website falsely attaching women’s preference of height to biology from 1 million years ago. Again, if that’s the case women might as well be fostering a taboo attraction to chimpanzees.
A person can be perfectly healthy and short at 5"2. The preference of women preferring to have sex with tall men, and tall men impregnating multiple more women than a short men ever has is the REASON people get taller. Environment and diet do have an effect.
Plus, 7 inches in height does not equate with being able to win fights. I won’t deny there is an advantage, but I’ve been the product and witnessed others being the product too many times of proving that if tall men want to physically challenge all the short men of the world (for the sake of this war I'll allow 5"9 ers to join) in a fight then this theory of tall beats short would be erased. Weight has more to do with a fight than height (and don’t start the height and weight correlation because there is also the center of gravity advantage and overweight disadvantages) I’m not saying the tall might not win or that the short wouldn’t win, but what I am saying is there would be a drastic shortage of all mankind on earth trying to prove that point as fact.
The other danger in people wrongly assuming this is that there is no way a short person can prove or change your mind. No matter how many people I personally have fought, how many other people I've seen shorter than their opponents have fought and won (not discounting how many tall people I've seen beat up short people) there will never be enough proof to this fighting claim to change your mind. Every time a short person wins everybody acts as if it went against the laws of nature. It ain't against no law of nature that nature doesn't apply for such a small change of height and weight. It's not like we're talking 2 feet difference or 120 extra pounds of muscle; and if we were then people 6'2 and under would all be falling under the category of small and weak and incapable of defending a woman against 7'0 men 300 pounds. This is the logic and truth. Everything else that challenges this logic and signs on with "he's 5 inches taller than you, he'll kick your a$$"is pure absurdity. I can't even fight to prove this and if I did then I'd lose the battle by trying to prove it to you
I’m sure also that hundreds of thousands of tall men would courageously love to sign up to prove me wrong on the fighting odds. The intimidation factor is obvious. Bouncers. If you are bigger then your size will intimidate others and you very well might be a wimp but people will assume you can fight and possibly never challenge you if you are intimidating enough. A shorter person might be the better fighter and have the most intimidating face, but he will not be able to rely on intimidation to weaken an opponent. Instead quite the opposite will happen, and if he challenges another then most likely that person will accept the challenge. Thus, an average height man and a short man will have many more physical altercations than a tall big man; I purposely exclude tall skinny man from this after reading Kareem Abdul Jabaar's book.
In support of physics, if a tall man with weight proportioned evenly to his height is against a shorter man then physics does prove that due to his height and weight together his body is able to exert more power behind his punch. This can be true, but it will not determine the outcome of a battle since short men are not prone to injury, are more coordinated due to the square cube law, have a low center of gravity and regardless of height the ability to use your body greatly determines the outcome of any fight.
I also think any tall man can attest to being beat up by a smaller man once or twice in his life. I could keep going with this, but the main point is that it is just more attractive to women and society to be taller. There is no proven science behind why it is morally okay and okay by nature. It is just preferred that all animals prefer an average. Women do go to exaggerating the height preference more than others, especially American women. 7 inches for humans is like a 7 inch difference between a great white vs another great white. They’re both great white sharks and a 7 inch difference is an advantage the same way good eyesight is an advantage, not to be confused with a deciding factor or automatic win for 7 inches. But humans aren’t damn sharks! No $#!+ Sherlock. That’s my point,7 inches is such a minuscule difference in the whole animal kingdom that if it were not for our intelligence and pickiness as humans then we would recognize how immaterial 7 inches is, unless you are a woman in heat.
Back to my point and erasing all explicit content. No lion backs down from another lion due to a little difference in size, it is the drastic difference. Now if we are talking about a complete foot or a 60 pound advantage then yes. I am not trying to throw a WWF wrestler against 5”2 wrestler, but if you’re talking 50 lb weight difference and only 7 inches and the shorter man is better coordinated, trained, and well crafted in muscle against a tall man of 6"0 who is lean with no muscle frame and uncoordinated then my money is on the short man. If both are equally athletic and one has weight advantage and height then yes, the advantage is highly in favor of the tall; thus the reason for weight classes in boxing and wrestling.
I have gone so far to hear people equate short men’s strength with women. I do not mean for the following statement to use women as a talking point to insult them.
It is not only the size of men that make men physically stronger. The muscle connections and fibers in men’s upper body is stronger by nature than the majority of women. This is regardless of height. The testosterone that supports strength and endurance in men is higher in men, regardless of height. The recent allowance of female’s in marine combat shows that 55% of women fail the test to be able to do 3 pull ups. Short men in the military and marines never record this problem in any number less than average or tall men. All men do 24 pull-ups in the marines. Some women can beat men up. I doubt many women can, but some can. This is all I will say on that. I really do not think women want to challenge short men to strength competitions.
The display of women running into man as the video shows is also something women will only do when protected by the public. In other words, according to what I've read, women feel protected from other-men when around taller men. So a woman then also does things she would possibly not do in private in public when she feels protected. Clearly what I mean is from experience. I am told I am short and small. Yes. But, then when I see a woman walking alone and nobody around the only thing I see is fear. Now, the same woman who looks at me as not a threat is terrified of me when nobody is around? All of a sudden her logic does not match and she is afraid of the very one that earlier she attempted to bully. How many women are with men 5”7 and above who physically appear in muscle mass and coordination to not be capable of fighting anyone, yet they are with that man because he is cute or taller than they are. The muscle and physical protection does not matter as much to the woman as much as height does. http://wn.com/height_discrimination
The END is Near
Now, I have mentioned fighting because when a person gets beat up they often go in a mental dark place of depression that often leads to attempting suicides or mass murders.
My point is to show the reference of attributes people put on taller and bigger people by attaching all things that are good to them; be it true or not. They want it to be true; therefore the "lie becomes the truth"-Billie Jean. This means being smarter, winning fights, being more attractive, being more confident, serving as a model to represent who you are, being more healthy. This is what people want to attach to height, so therefore the same way people want to attach negative things to short men that aren’t true, people also attach false positives to people who are tall.
I have seen many awkward men who are tall be called awkwardly charming and cute. I grew up with people, who physically grew much taller, but when we were young they were the nerds or weak minded and willed and cried and the most insecure with funny walks, no social skills but later in my years I saw how people automatically assumed that person could fight and that-that person had an easy time with women and was very sociable. People later would try to set their daughters up with these guys. These guys were courted for pictures. These guys were exposed, molded, trained, and forced/given ample opportunities to improve themselves so that they could fit the standard and qualities that the world was wanting them to exemplify. Some of them crossed over and succeeded in becoming more confident and focused due to this. I have also seen people in elementary school and middle school that were confident, strong, smart, funny, talented and admired not grow physically and take on low self-esteem later in their years.
Excuses are made for tall people when they fall short in any category of greatness, yet blame for a non-existent complex is put on any short man for achieving anything of merit.
If a short man does do something great he is now known as "the little giant, a man small in stature but tall in (insert whatever)."
How many funerals have I gone to and heard this said? "He might have been short, but he was….."
I can understand a woman preferring a taller man based on looks. Men have done this to women forever. Now that women finally (after many human rights/civil fights) have been able to make more money, it can be no surprise that they now want trophy husbands and are more selective in choosing a man. Their preference has shown they prefer tall men above looks and character, although they will tell you to your face something entirely different. I am not female bashing. Get what you want. I can only imagine how many women have chosen a man they were not physically attracted to and married them, only to find themselves probably not liking his personality and his physical. Again, men have proven we have preferences too. I can be critical and hypocritical, but I do try hard to be truthful and not ignorant. It is the degree of hypocrisy versus similarity that my essay is pointed to.
Fact is a woman in America will prefer a skinny tall or average height man over a short physically fit strong man. This logic does not match what I thought was supposed to be the strength factor/protection logic. These are the reasons I don't buy that the science of tall being more fit and physically able to beat up short men is the reason women prefer tall men. A woman will prefer an overweight man with height over a short man that is very cute in the face, makes money and has a good personality. A woman will take a man with a handicap, a prison record, a bad attitude, a liar and a cheater, over a short honest man. Short men get some of the women I've formally mentioned, after she has kids by the former men. Short healthy men are right at the bottom of the list above the physically handicapped in wheelchairs.
Short men will: have women say that height doesn't matter, have kids come up to them in grocery stores and measure themselves next to you, hear girlfriends make excuses for your height to their friends and parents, have parents be ashamed of you, have your own children ask why their father is smaller than other fathers, have children afraid they will be your height, have women afraid your children will be your height, have jobs pay you less, be ridiculed by your peers, family and friends all because of your height and have height be the subject of their ridicule, will have a higher chance in being in a relationship with a woman that is less attractive in more physical features than himself [no hypocrisy], will most likely date and marry a woman who already has kids by a taller man, will have every accomplishment and failure in their life attributed to their height, will be told they have short man syndrome, will be run into in public by complete strangers 700X more than men of regular height, will have noone believe your experience as a short man, will constantly have to work against prejudices, will constantly be reminded by people telling them they are short, will find women want to take pictures with you while you are sitting down and try to not have you stand up, will have cousins not want you to pick them up from school due to you being short, will not know what it is like for other kids and family to be proud of your looks and want to show you or introduce you to anyone--yet in the same breath will beg of you to loan them money, find them jobs, let them live with you, and ask you to introduce them to other people, you will be considered on the outside of your own family with your parents and brothers and sisters, you will turn on the tv/radio/internet and see multiple images of other short men in demeaning insulting positions, you will not be able to find people that look like you that are admirable, you will be ostracized by your own race, religion, through stories, your own gender and opposite gender, you will be told it's all in your head like Cheshire the Cat, you will be mistaken for a child, you will be challenged to fight by both men and women due to your size, you will receive an abundance of people wanting to talk to you as though you are stupid or a child or someone not worthy of any respect, you will have people think you wear lifts, you will have people associate everything you are with your height, you will die sooner than the average male, you will have a hard time finding other men your same height, you will find that most people in walking or passing will pretend you do not exist and will not give you eye contact that they do offer others,you will find absolutely no support or recognition of the wrongs to you inflicted on you by others due to your height, if you date a beautiful woman you will highly increase your chances of having other jealous men approach you and make jokes about your height in front of your mate, you will have friends and loved ones say to you they are glad they are not short, you will be patted on the head, you will be picked up, you will be expected to act as though none of this exists and yet told you have the problem, you will endure this until the day you die or go to a place where you are no longer considered unusually short.
[part 4] Moral to the story
MIRROR
This is the irony of a short man looking in the mirror and wanting to reap that he sows. Many people's weird logic says a short man should learn from his discrimination and go find a woman who has equally been discriminated against. Let me translate that or articulate that better. A short man should find an unattractive woman. So, he should find a woman that he does not find physically attractive because he is deemed physically unattractive?? This is where the truth enters. A short man does not find himself unattractive unless he is ugly. Short and ugly is something I will have to respect and honor and let that man speak on that. This has not been my experience. Since I am a short man I do not want an unattractive woman. I want my mirror. She can be my height, an inch or two taller or 3 to 4 inches shorter; that is preference. Truthfully, I can fall in love and date a woman with more height deviations but I am making a point. The point is it is completely NATURAL by NATURE to expect to be able to date a beautiful woman 5"4, 5'3, 5'2,5'1, 5'0, 4'11, 4'10. I should not have to date a woman that is unattractive and bares a host of other unattractive physical features that we do not share in common.
[no hypocrisy]
The things I write are not going to change any woman's mind; I know this. I'm not trying to change minds. No man in his right mind writes what I have written to try and pick up women. Do I need to repeat how I've never spoken to anyone about this except my brother? I'm not an idiot.
But back to matching up with your mate, basically if you are not the average then I expect the treatment to be also not average; so basically short men being discriminated against is not right but if it is deemed unattractive by women then I can accept it as an unattractive feature in men. It is expected to count against you in the 1-10 ratings chart, but I highly disagree with the degree of disrespect and total rejection the world administers[which has nothing to do with sexual attraction]. It should not be given to this degree for this type of thing. A 5'2 man should get 50%less women than a 6'0 or taller man because he is according to women harboring an unattractive feature, but this percentage of 50% is far from what is seen. Generally a short man 5'4 and under is receiving like 96% percent less than men 6'0 or taller that share or match all his same credentials and other physical looks in life besides height and weight. http://www.eharmony.com/dating-advice/dating/why-do-women-all-seem-to-want-taller-men/
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/sciencetech/article-2270214/Why-vertically-challenged-men-short-end-stick-comes-marriage.html
I am stating the point that men, maybe not very attractive men, but many physically average looking men will date and approach many different types of women of all body and height sizes. I have not seen the same with women. Women will date a small range of height standards 5'9 and above, preferably, and they will put up or sacrifice for many things to achieve that preference from a man--even if it means accepting a large amount of personality differences; weirdo's, men who beat them, chauvinistic,no jobs, bad breath, unclean, no personality, health problems . Women will also accept men being overweight and bald or underweight and an average height. Since women typically do not approach men, this makes it so that when a man that does not reach these standards approaches this type of woman he will get one of the cruelest looks and hurtful words that any human can ever possibly think to receive from a person that they want to like, get to know and also tell they are attracted to. Mature men, not teenagers, rarely ever insult a woman that is attracted to them and approaching them for perhaps the first time to express her feelings to him. A man also will not look at you after you have spoken to him and then turn his head and roll his eyes and pretend you do not even exist. (I have seen women do this to men 5"9 and below also, but not to good looking men 5"8 and above)
It is logical for a 5”2 man to be able to date a 4”11 or 5”2 or 5"3 woman. Before the advances in medical science, even nature (the true natural selection/survival) made this height correlation a MUST. You remember when women used to die giving birth? Actually, I don't I'm too young but I've read about it. Well, many of those were due to the fact that there is not a dominant gene in height. Short and Tall are equally healthy and dominant. Therefore a short woman who gave birth to a 6”5 man’s baby could have a baby too tall for her body and it would push her organs and endanger the baby as well as her life. There were no C-sections. Those were the good old days. I am not saying that to be cruel to women, it can be seen that way, but only to emphasize that NATURE WAS LOOKING out for Short men and the correlation of heights for relationships was crucial for health. This is why I also don't buy the survival theory on sexual selection. This also made it so short women found short men attractive because the alternative could kill them; therefore they didn't seek men a foot taller than themselves. Then came advances in medicine and I’m sure people with senses of humor get the joke—that well….isn’t so funny to me. But, I do recognize the extreme’s women in America and the Western (minus China and Japan in the East which do value height) world have placed on height are ridiculous. They are more extreme than others. Many other cultures, if not all, value height but it is not as extremely valued as it is in America. The criticism and blind prejudice is also not exercised on shorter men as much either. The first time in my life I discovered nobody seemed to be judging me and treating me differently due to my height was when I left the USA. I noticed without ever looking to see --how they treated other short men from their own countries and saw less prejudice (although some did exist) exerted than in the USA. Studies have shown that more American women consider height to be a factor than British women. British women consider height to be more of a factor than French women. And women of the Indian subcontinent consider height to be almost irrelevant. It's no surprise American women are number one in a country that values Bigness and Height as achievements. http://www.shortsupport.org/Essays/MichaelCalwell.html. So it looks like to get fair treatment the short man must get a passport and find a country where the average height is shorter. This is the Moral to the story.
In conclusion: This will be the last time and first time I have written about my experience as a short man. I have had many friends and 8 close ones; and any adult can admit that having 8 close friends (and countless associates) is a blessing. I'm in no way blind to people with handicaps, or people's whose parents were abusive, molested people, homosexuals, overweight people, women, people considered physically unattractive, diseased, victims of war, people of one race or religion living among people in a majority different race or religion. We can continue naming. These people's stories of experience are true, enlightening and encouraging. I support them and pray for us all. My only hope is that anyone that reads what I write does not belittle it but can understand and help to let these words make them a better person as I have tried to use my experiences to make me a better person and help others whereas it has hurt me. Now, doesn't that sound Dandy? Nah,nah. That ain't so much me man. I'm damn sure not writing this to pick up women or jump on the pity bandwagon to I don't give a F* lane. I'm just writing this to let people know that this is what's up from a short man's perspective (all these puns have not been intended), but you probably already knew it so….cool. No, no, no. It's not cool. That's why I wrote all this crap. Life's a deck of cards. Some people's hand is screwed. Deal with it. This is the way I have to play it, but I'll let you in on the game--and you better stop telling me we have the same hand when I can see through the reflection in your glasses.
He quietly gets off his soap box, slips and busts his ass. Gets up and dirties the floor with soap scum as he walks away. The lights go off. No applause, a few tomatoes and banana peels, as the curtain closes. The letter after E and the letter after T and the horse you rode in on. Thank you all for my life very much and Goodnight. I hope one day you will be blessed to suffer in some way similar to me.
If you dared to read all this I've written then I sincerely thank you and wish you the best in life. If you feel I have proven nothing in my writing and YOU WANT PURE FACTS and NUMBERS and STATISTICS then please feel free to take advantage of my own research and research done by others, mainly the research is coming from "short support."
The credits roll as the following sources to validate all claims appear:
THE END…………………………………………………………………..
Articles on proving Short Men are treated differently than other men:
http://abcnews.go.com/Health/MensHealthNews/story?id=8347950
A short guy is interviewed and won’t show his face. He says: "The worst thing about being short is there is nothing I can do about it," said Jeff. "Fat people can diet and exercise, skinny people can eat and lift weights, ugly people can have plastic surgery. Being short is more akin to being disabled."
http://abcnews.go.com/2020/Story?id=230011&page=1
Nothing succeeded in making them prefer the shorter men. One woman even suggested that 20/20 describe the tall men as "murderers" to even the odds for the shorter men in the test. The women preferred murderers over short men.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AR3YR1ZTonc
[20/20 does a study:Video shows indisputable rule of love based on height.]
http://abcnews.go.com/Health/MensHealthNews/story?id=8347950
[Short man’s syndrome is debunked by research. It does not exist.]
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0wRt2rffdco
[Kenyans also show heightism]
http://www.shortsupport.org/News/0035.html
[British and Polish studies prove women prefer tall men]
http://www.shortsupport.org/News/0092.html
[a written interview with many short men and women critiquing height]
http://www.jonathanrauch.com/jrauch_articles/height_discrimination_short_guys_finish_last/
[article by a writer describing all the things short men go through; citing examples of criticism on short men by Bill Clinton and others]
http://bellapetite.com/height-discrimination-waitresses-fired-for-being-too-short-petite-models.html
[waitress fired for being too short]
http://www.eeoc.gov/laws/practices/inquiries_height_weight.cfm
[US equal employment website acknowledges heightism exists and is a form of discrimination]
disproven theory of eugenics.
http://wn.com/height_discrimination
(short men are physically run into 700X more so than other people on sidewalk collisions)
http://witchrants.wordpress.com/2013/04/27/rant-on-height-discrimination-against-shorter-women-and-men/
[a short man rants on about his experience as a short man and what he has witnessed]
http://www.ign.com/blogs/Lost_In_Translation/2010/09/23/1-43-short-men-tall-women-height-discrimination-2/
[IGN surveys and research proving numerous accounts of heightism’s effect on society and women’s preferences for tall men]
http://writ.news.findlaw.com/dorf/20040526.html
[Chinese had written laws of discrimination; stating not to hire short people]
http://myfloridalegal.com/ago.nsf/Opinions/2C95C3D0169E0F61852566B3005D23C1
[Court case. CIVIL RIGHTS--DISCRIMINATORY EFFECTS OF HEIGHT AND WEIGHT REQUIREMENTS]Minimum height and weight limits for highway patrol and firemen
http://www.ohioemployerlawblog.com/2013/07/the-long-and-short-of-height.html#.UsEpZih1P0c
[Arizona Department of Agriculture is asked to consider heightism as discriminator. Woman files suit]
http://www.foxnews.com/story/2007/05/18/weight-and-height-may-be-added-to-massachusetts-anti-discrimination-laws/
[Heightism is added to Michigan’s anti-discrimination laws]
http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/15161403
[The effect of physical height on workplace success and income: preliminary test of a theoretical model]
http://shortpeoplegotnobody.weebly.com/
(Are short men pushed around on sidewalks)
http://www.economist.com/node/1011419
[a Chinese man, has brought a case against a branch of China's central bank for discriminating against job applicants who are on the short side.]
http://www.askmen.com/dating/heidi/51_dating_girl.html
[what it means to be short, and some suggestions for short men]
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Human_height
{Height according to Wikipedia. What determines height, height and salary, history of human height, height charts around the world}
http://www.xojane.com/it-happened-to-me/discrimination-against-short-men
[short man tells his coming of age story] Oh, c’mon!” I’ve heard many, many times. “People don’t treat you any differently because you’re short.”
http://goodmenproject.com/noseriouslywhatabouttehmenz/unconscious-bias-against-short-men/
[A test is given. The IATs have shown a systematic bias against short men– in fact, the scientist interviewed in the video compares the magnitude of the effect to that of race or ethnicity. Even more interestingly, this is almost entirely a subconscious bias.]
http://thesocietypages.org/socimages/2012/04/23/unconscious-bias-against-short-men/
[This four-minute video reports research showing that, even if we’re not aware of it, most of us have unconscious biases against short men.] (It’s also a great description of Implicit Association Tests.)
Test that you can take, proves height bias: https://implicit.harvard.edu/implicit/
dating sites report short men get the fewest responses
http://nypost.com/2013/12/08/short-men-dont-stack-up-with-nyc-women/
[On Dating sites:The likelihood that a man under 5-foot-9 is contacted by a Manhattan or Bronx woman online is a scant 1.2 percent. ]
http://www.thegloss.com/2013/05/06/beauty/gosh-i-feel-bad-for-short-men/
[A woman notices the height discrimination given by women toward short men]
napoleon was never short
http://heresyourfix.wordpress.com/2010/02/20/true-story-why-napoleon-could-never-have-had-a-napoleon-complex/
[Napoleon was not short]
http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=394830
proof that the short man complex doesn't exist: The myth of the Napoleon complex and other short subjects
http://www.digitaljournal.com/article/180853/
Read more: http://www.digitaljournal.com/article/180853/#ixzz2q7RoZrTn
[Testing the Short man syndrome and Napoleon complex "The Napoleon Complex" - Short Men Are More Aggressive - Fact Or Fiction?]
http://www.news.com.au/national/doctors-debunk-short-man-syndrome-myth/story-e6frfkp9-1111113254807
[Doctors debunk 'short man syndrome' myth]
http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/uk_news/6501633.stm
[Short men 'not more aggressive']
Height has been known to affect a man's sexuality
http://www.akawilliam.com/study-very-short-very-tall-men-more-likely-to-be-gay
[shows an unusual amount of short men are gay]
http://www.sheknows.com/love-and-sex/articles/844767/why-short-guys-rule
[some random woman talking about short men are strong and why she like them.] "Plus, a healthy 160-pound, 5-foot-5 man is going to be a stronger protector than a healthy 160-pound, 5-foot-11 man. It's been well documented, pound for pound, shorter men have greater endurance, stronger muscles, faster reaction times, faster body movement and are less likely to break bones.
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/sciencetech/article-2270214/Why-vertically-challenged-men-short-end-stick-comes-marriage.html
only 3.8% of women date men shorter than themselves. Men of average height and up to 6 inches taller have more kids than men 6"7 and taller, but men 6'7 have more kids than the least in the group from 5'4 and down.
[at the end of this study and graphs a professor concludes:Professor Cohen comments: 'Humans could couple up differently, if they wanted to. If it were desirable to have a taller-woman-shorter-man relationship, it could be much more common.
'In these data, we could find shorter husbands for 28 percent of the wives. Instead, people exaggerate the difference by seeking out taller-man-shorter-woman pairings for marriage]
Short women make more money: (although I do believe very short women 5"1 and under do face discrimination)
Update: Another study finds that shorter women make more money. Bakadesuyo concludes: "Looks like men get rewarded for what is deemed as masculine and women get rewarded for what is seen as feminine. Seems to make sense. I didn't say it was fair, I just said it made sense."http://www.theatlantic.com/business/archive/2010/05/studies-short-people-are-dumb-poor-criminals/56372/
http://www.freshbusinessthinking.com/news.php?NID=3228&Title=Figures+Reveal+Executives+Are+Focusing+On+Beauty+And+Height+To+Keep+Jobs+In+Recession#.UsOHuyh1P0c
Cop is harassed by fellow coworkers for being short.
http://www.shortsupport.org/News/0645.html
Chinese woman declined job: http://www.shortsupport.org/News/0429.html
Films/Commercials/Documentaries:
http://www.shortsupport.org/TheMedia/comedies/basketball-ziats.html
http://www.shortsupport.org/TheMedia/comedies/rock-mangano.html
http://www.shortsupport.org/TheMedia/comedies/frasier-sgoldsmith.html
http://www.shortsupport.org/TheMedia/comedies/twins-blisniesky.html
http://www.shortsupport.org/TheMedia/comedies/blackadder-calwell.html
http://www.shortsupport.org/TheMedia/comedies/taxi-sgoldsmith.html
http://www.shortsupport.org/TheMedia/comedies/fawlty-calwell.html
http://www.shortsupport.org/TheMedia/comedies/mash-sgoldsmith.html
http://www.shortsupport.org/TheMedia/comedies/lucy-palma.html
http://www.shortsupport.org/TheMedia/comedies/shrek-arnold.html
( I remember shrek 2 with the prince being short and evil and often being berated for being short and evil)
http://www.shortsupport.org/TheMedia/comics/popeye-jason.html
Commercials: almost all of Kevin Hart's commercials (Nick Cannon and Kevin Hart)
Michael Jordan and Spike Lee
Credit Score 3 guys
Title Max
http://www.shortsupport.org/TheMedia/commercials/titlemax-DiMonte.html
http://www.shortsupport.org/TheMedia/commercials/fram-nguyen.html
http://www.shortsupport.org/TheMedia/commercials/casualmalexl-moriarty.html
http://www.shortsupport.org/TheMedia/commercials/burgerking-summers.html
http://www.shortsupport.org/TheMedia/commercials/tmobile-goldsmith.html
just go here for all the commercials against short men:
http://www.shortsupport.org/TheMedia/commercials/index.html
http://www.shortsupport.org/TheMedia/index.html
CNN with Paula Zahn, Report on Heightism, Aired 3/19/07.Matt Campisi, president of the National Organization of Short Statured Adults (NOSSA) and Ellen Frankel, author of "Beyond Measure: a memoir about short stature & inner growth" are interviewed by CNN's Dan Lothian. This is a thoughtful report on how short people are treated in life, relationships and the workplace.
Documentary on short people:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9ibugwdAiCM
• Homer Stokes from O Brother, Where Art Thou?
• Bob from Becker
• Bob 'Bulldog' Briscoe from Frasier
• Louie De Palma from Taxi (played by Danny DeVito, who is only 5 ft, or 1.52 m tall)
• Bud Bundy from Married... with Children (played by David Faustino, who is only 5 ft 3 inches, or 1.60 m tall)
• Radar O'Reilly from M*A*S*H
• Spence Olchin from The King of Queens
• Kerry Hennessy from the TV series 8 Simple Rules
• Gimli (played by John Rhys-Davies, who is 6 ft 1 inch, or 1.85m tall) and other dwarves from The Lord of the Rings trilogy
• Edward Elric from the anime Fullmetal Alchemist
• Ripto of the videogame series Spyro the Dragon
George from Seinfeld, Carlton from Fresh Prince, Spence from King of Queens, Martin off Martin, Kevin Hart.
Robin Meade and that weather man Bob Van Dillen: when the guy Ariel Castro who kidnapped all those little girls was sentenced they made a thousand short jokes.
For those that say short men aren't just strong but some of the absolute strongest:Tamio "Tommy" Kono 5"6, waldemar baszanowski 5"5, Franco Columbo 5”5, Nikolay Pechalov 5"8 (not short in my book, but in some peoples), Pyrros Dimas 5"8, Halil Mutlu 4"11 but only one of five men in history to lift 3 times his weight. Alexander the Great 5'0. I could keep listing short men, but I'm tired of the subject of short men.
